ASHLEY ON OWNERSHIP
- Ashley Taylor
- Aug 18
- 4 min read
The Wealth Conversation Families Should Be Having Around the Kitchen Table
By Ashley Taylor, Licensed NYS Realtor® | Patriot Real Properties
Most families will talk about money at the kitchen table.
The mortgage.
The taxes.
The electric bill.
College.
Retirement.
What everything costs now compared to five years ago.
But there’s one conversation I think far too many families avoid:
What are we eventually going to do with the house?
It sounds like a simple question.
It usually isn’t.
For many families, the house is one of the largest assets they will ever own. It may also be where children grew up, where holidays happened, where parents planned to grow old, and where decades of memories live.
That makes it emotional.
But it also makes it financial.
And waiting until there is a crisis to talk about it can leave families making very big decisions during one of the worst possible times to make them.
I see real estate differently because of what I do every day. A house is absolutely a home — but it is also an asset, an expense, a potential source of equity, and sometimes an opportunity.
Families should be talking about all of it.
Start With the Question Nobody Wants to Ask
What happens to Mom and Dad’s house someday?
Nobody loves that conversation.
But having it doesn’t mean you’re planning for something bad to happen. It means you’re planning while everyone can actually participate in the decision.
Maybe the parents want to stay there forever.
Maybe they eventually want to downsize.
Maybe one child hopes to keep the house.
Maybe nobody wants it.
Maybe the property has appreciated significantly and selling it could change the parents’ retirement.
Maybe there is still a mortgage.
Maybe there are repairs that have been put off for years.
Those are very different situations.
Simply saying, “The kids will figure it out,” isn’t really a plan.
Your Parents May Be Sitting on More Wealth Than They Realize
This is something I wish more families understood.
Someone can live very modestly and still own an extremely valuable asset.
A parent may have purchased a home decades ago for a fraction of what it is worth today. They may not think of themselves as having significant wealth because that wealth isn’t sitting in a bank account.
It’s sitting underneath them.
That doesn’t automatically mean they should sell it.
It means they should understand it.
What is the property realistically worth?
How much equity exists?
What does it cost to maintain?
Could that equity help create a more comfortable retirement?
Would downsizing make financial sense?
Could the house become a rental?
Could another family member eventually purchase it?
There isn’t one correct answer.
But there should be a conversation.
And Adult Children Need to Talk About Their Own Real Estate Plans Too
This conversation shouldn’t only be about aging parents.
I think parents and adult children should know what each other is trying to build.
Is someone trying to buy their first house?
Is another family member interested in investing?
Is somebody renting because they assume they could never qualify for a mortgage?
Is there a family member who would love to purchase the family home one day?
Sometimes families have opportunities sitting right in front of them, but nobody knows because nobody talks about money or real estate.
I’m not suggesting everyone combine finances or start buying houses together.
I’m saying knowledge creates options.
One House Can Affect More Than One Generation
We talk a lot about generational wealth.
Sometimes it sounds like you need millions of dollars, a huge investment portfolio and some complicated financial strategy to create it.
You don’t.
For many American families, generational wealth begins with something much more ordinary:
A house.
One property that was purchased, maintained, paid down and appreciated over time can eventually help another generation.
Maybe through inheritance.
Maybe through equity.
Maybe through a sale.
Maybe by helping someone else get started.
Maybe simply because the next generation learns how ownership works earlier than the generation before them did.
That last part matters.
Knowledge can be passed down too.
Don’t Wait for the Emergency
I’ve watched enough real estate decisions happen because something suddenly changed.
A parent gets sick.
Someone passes away.
A marriage changes.
A job disappears.
Taxes become difficult to manage.
A house becomes too much to maintain.
Suddenly everyone is standing around that same kitchen table trying to figure out what to do.
That is the hardest time to begin the conversation.
I’d rather see families sit down while everything is fine.
Ask questions.
Find out what everyone actually wants.
Understand what the property is worth.
Understand what options exist.
And then go back to dinner.
You don’t need to make a decision that night.
You just need to stop pretending the conversation doesn’t eventually need to happen.
My Advice? Start With One Question.
The next time your family is sitting around the table, ask:
“Have we ever actually talked about what we want to happen with the house someday?”
You might be surprised where that conversation goes.
And if part of that conversation requires understanding what a property is worth, what selling would look like, whether buying makes sense, or what other real estate options your family has, that’s where I can help.
I don’t believe my job is simply to sell houses.
I believe part of my job is helping people understand what real estate can mean for their lives, their families and their future.
Ashley Taylor
Licensed NYS Salesperson
Patriot Real Properties
791 Middle Country Rd., Selden, NY
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